Cat sex is painful. The reason: a cat’s penis has about 100 tiny barbed hooks on it. The hooks are made of the same stuff that the claws are made of.

During the mating act, the barbs scratch the heck out of the female cat’s hoo-hah.  The scratching, while painful, also releases some chemicals that let the body know that it’s time to produce some eggs.

Unlike a teenage human, a cat can’t get pregnant their first time.  It usually takes about 4 times before the body is ready.  Lions, however, don’t take any chances, so they’ll mate up to 100 times per day.

All cats are sluts.  They will mate with any male they can find – the more the better.  Cats have multiple kittens in their litters.  Something like 80% of cat litters have kittens from multiple fathers, which makes kitty child support very difficult to figure out.

Lest you think I made this all up to disturb you, here’s a video clip of the show I saw last night.

Oh, and The Ritten, who had just given birth when we got her, is grounded for life.

I caught a show on the National Geographic Channel last night about a sunken Australian Submarine from WWI.

They sent divers down to check it out.  I was trying to fall asleep at the time, but the voices in the show caught my attention.  Because they sounded like they were on helium.

They were.

It turns out that in certain conditions divers mix helium with their oxygen to avoid the affects of “nitrogen narcosis.”  The positive effect: no “nitrogen narcosis,” which sounds rather uncomfortable.  The downside: communication gets a little tough when everyone sounds like chipmunks.

For a brief history of mixed gas diving, head here.

Please forgive the post-Halloween Halloween post, but I only learned the legend of Stingy Jack last night.

Stingy Jack was a trickster who lived in Ireland.  No one was safe from Jack’s pranks, even the Devil himself…

Stingy Jack invited the Devil to have a drink with him. True to his name, Stingy Jack didn’t want to pay for his drink, so he convinced the Devil to turn himself into a coin that Jack could use to buy their drinks. Once the Devil did so, Jack decided to keep the money and put it into his pocket next to a silver cross, which prevented the Devil from changing back into his original form. Jack eventually freed the Devil, under the condition that he would not bother Jack for one year and that, should Jack die, he would not claim his soul. The next year, Jack again tricked the Devil into climbing into a tree to pick a piece of fruit. While he was up in the tree, Jack carved a sign of the cross into the tree’s bark so that the Devil could not come down until the Devil promised Jack not to bother him for ten more years.

Sadly, Jack died soon after that.  He tried to go up to Heaven, but God wasn’t interested in hosting such a notorious stingy prankster.  So he had no choice but to go to Hell.

But there was a problem.  The Devil had already agreed not to claim Jack’s soul.  Plus, Jack was too much for even the Devil to handle.  So the Devil sent Jack back from whence he came.  But there was another problem.  It was too dark for Jack to see.

So he asked the Devil for a light.  The Devil, being an obliging fellow, tossed Jack an ember from the fires of Hell.  Jack stored the ember in a hollowed out turnip, which he of course had on him.

Jack has since been doomed to wander in the darkness alone.  In an effort to ward off the evil wandering spirits, the Irish townsfolk began carving their own turnips.

When Irish immigrants made it to America in the 1800’s they discovered the pumpkin, which was much better for carving than a turnip.

And that, my friends, is how we got the Jack of the Lantern, or Jack-o-Lantern.

Happy belated Halloween.

Source: History Channel Website, here, and here.  But originally on the National Geographic Channel.

Some trivia about big cats that I picked up last night:

• These cats are considered “hyper-carnivores” because they eat only meat. No wimpy vegetables for these guys.
• Cats have very small brains. Most of their skull is constructed to make room for their powerful jaw muscles. So the term “kitty smart” is more accurate than originally thought.
• Cats cannot move their jaws sideways. Only up and down. So that is why you sometimes see cats eating with their heads tilted sideways.

And now, a chart to help you identify the various types of big cats:

Lion King of the jungle. Generally Worry-Free, though sometimes the stress of leading can cause dramatic effects. Hakuna Matata.

Tiger The favorite cat of Siskel & Ebert Erbert & Gerbert Shirley & Laverne Siegfried & Roy. Loves Frosted Flakes (of corn).

Leopard These cats tend to think they are superior to other cats because they cost more. The cats are favored mostly by artists and other elitists.

Cheetah With a fondness for snacking, these cats eat constantly. They are also fast. Very fast. They make a pretty decent pizza, but their logo skills need some work.

Panther The panther is the most radical and paranoid of the big cats, always thinking the other cats (specifically white tigers and snow leopards) are trying to bring them down. They have also been known to engage in voter intimidation.

Bobcat These cats are good diggers. They also occasionally light fires despite lack of opposable thumbs.

Jaguar The most overrated of the big cats. Jaguars are found mostly in the Americas. But really, who would want to import a really expensive Ford Taurus?

Puma a.k.a. cougars and mountain lions, Pumas peaked in popularity in the 1980’s.

Cougar a.k.a. pumas and mountain lions, Cougars are mostly found in Hollywood. Though there are enclaves in Montana, and of course, small towns.

The Ritten Although not technically a big cat, she deserves an honorable mention.

A few things I learned about The Hindenburg:

• Only 35 of the 97 people on board died. There were others who survived with serious injuries, but many people had just minor cuts and bruises.
• The company that operated The Hindenburg had a 100% safety record prior to this incident and had been in operation for over 20 years.
• The “real” cause of the disaster is not known. There are several theories, but none that have been definitively proven and accepted. Either way, using Hydrogen didn’t help.
• However, one of the causes was definitely pilot error. Airships were very susceptible to bad weather and wind. The Hindenburg was 12 hours behind schedule due to a strong head wind over the Atlantic. They had a return flight of some high rollers that needed to make it to King George VI’s coronation in London. So the pilot took some risks and landed in less than perfect weather. The pilot was under intense pressure from Hitler to make the Germans look good. Any delays would be an embarrassment for Germany. I’m thinking a fiery explosion was probably worse than a delay.
• Inside the outer shell there were 16 giant cotton bags filled with Hydrogen. The gray outer surface was cotton and linen that was basically painted with aluminum and iron oxide and attached to a frame. The bags of hydrogen were inside. I always thought the thing was like one big balloon just filled up with hydrogen, but that is not the case.

Source: National Geographic Channel

Marine One is the call sign for any Helicopter that carries the President of the United States.

Some Marine One Trivia:

• Presidential helicopter transport is always handled by the special Marine squadron called HMX-1. There are over 700 Marines in the squadron.
• There are over 20 different aircraft in the current fleet, and there are several different models. The largest can transport 15 people. All of the helicopters are set to be replaced in the next few years.
• Any time Marine One flies, it is accompanied by 2 – 5 decoy helicopters. The choppers fly in a “shell game” pattern to throw off would-be attackers.
• Whenever the President travels in Air Force One, a detachment of helicopters flies with him, regardless of whether helicopter travel is planned or not.
• Wherever Marine One lands there is a ceremonial Marine Guard waiting to greet him. One time Bill Clinton requested an impromptu landing in the Grand Canyon and was surprised to see a Marine waiting to greet him.
• When the helicopter lands on the South Lawn at the White House, there are 3 precisely positioned discs, each 6 feet in diameter, that the pilot must land the wheels on. This ensures that the helicopter is in the correct position. The discs also help distribute the weight of the helicopter, so that it doesn’t make holes in the lawn.

Bonus Trivia: The United States is the only country that provides its chief executive with his own transportation anywhere in the world.

Source: National Geographic Channel

Kittens can’t hear for 12 days after they are born.

Also, when the kittens are born, the mother cat eats the placenta. It contains some nutrients that are good for the cat (or something like that).

Source: National Geographic Channel show about Cats in the Womb

Seriously people, this body art thing has got to stop.

Yes, you can actually tattoo the white part of your eyeball. Not like you’d ever end up regretting that brilliant decision.

It only takes 40 pokes with a needle to get it done. You do face potential death if things go wrong.

Saw it on the National Geographic Channel. I was going to include a picture with this post, but thought it best to make you follow the link instead. A little too disturbing to just have hanging out on the front page here.

Two other noteworthy items that I didn’t squeeze into the last post about the Secret Service:

• The Blood Supply – One of the arrangements that is made when the President travels is to ensure that there is a local supply of blood available in the President’s blood type. Local hospitals are identified, and a Secret Service agent ensures that they have enough of the right blood.
• Training – Being on the President’s protection detail is a high honor for a Secret Service Agent. The President gets the best and the brightest. But even the best have to get training. An agent on the President’s detail will go through 2 weeks of training for every 8 weeks that they work. (6 weeks on, 2 in training) They run through a ton of likely attack scenarios so that the agent’s response is “automatic.” They also have training that specializes in overriding the natural instinct to run away from danger, since agents have to run toward it.

Source: National Geographic Channel

The United States Secret Service was created in 1865 as a wing of the US Treasury Department with a mission to get counterfeit currency under control. It is estimated that after the Civil War, up to 50% of the nation’s currency was counterfeit. Obviously that would have a drastic effect on the economy and inflation.

Counterfeiting was so wide spread that the identities of the original agents had to be kept secret to avoid tipping off the bad guys. Hence the “Secret” part.

The agency pre-dates all other federal law enforcement agencies. Originally the mission was strictly related to counterfeit currency, though it was quickly expanded to include many other infractions of federal law such as bootlegging, smuggling, and mail robbing. As the Federal Government grew, more agencies (like the FBI and ATF) were created and responsibilities shifted.

The Secret Service did not get into the Presidential Protection business until the turn of the century. Early Americans bent over backwards to avoid having their President looking like a King, and protection was one of those things that felt King-like. The President was supposed to be a man of the people.

It wasn’t until the 3rd Presidential assassination in 35 years (Lincoln 1865, Garfield 1881, and McKinley 1901) that the idea of Presidential protection really caught on.

In 1901 congress asked for protection of Theodore Roosevelt (McKinley’s successor) but the request was informal and temporary. From 1906 – 1950 the authorization to provide protection needed to be renewed annually.

After Harry Truman was attacked in 1950 (I wrote about it in this post, which a crazy Puerto Rican guy commented on when I wasn’t looking) congress finally made the protection permanent. As an aside, before his attack, Truman would routinely take strolls down Pennsylvania Avenue without any guards. My how times have changed.

As time went on protection was extended to the President’s family, the VP, former Presidents, President-Elects, and after the RFK assanation, certain presidential candidates. Some visiting foreign dignitaries qualify for protection as well.

In 2003, the Secret Service became part of the Department of Homeland Security, rather than the Treasury. Despite this, they do retain the responsibility of investigating counterfeit currency in addition to protection.

Source: National Geographic Channel and The USSS web site.