By now you’ve probably heard about the drunken spending spree that our government recently undertook.

But did you know that you’ll be getting an additional $8 per week in your paycheck as a result?!?!?!

A whole $8!!!!!!!!!! ($13 if you’re married. Woot!)

I remember our new President droning on ad nauseum during the campaign about his $1000 tax cut plan for 95% of Americans (whether they actually pay taxes or not). But I guess there was only room for $800 instead of the $1000.

The rest went to urgent stimulus funding like STD prevention, the NEA, and Amtrak.

So just to clarify again- they spent $1,000,000,000,000 (that’s more than $1,000,000 per day since the birth of Jesus, or 1 AD for you non-Jesus folk) and you get $8 a week.

I’m feeling hopeandchangey!

Any particular lot of Ikea merchandise is allowed 3 reported “irregularities,” such as missing parts, pieces not working correctly, etc. Any more than that, and the store has to open all of the boxes for the whole lot and verify the pieces.

Source: An extraordinarily frustrating Ikea experience today. I was irregularity #1 of the batch, which only cost me an hour of my time to correct because the dumb @$%$#^% I talked to on the phone was a moron.

There are 112 minutes of broadcast time in a 3 hour nationally syndicated radio talk show.

Source: The Hugh Hewitt Show

But they hate everyone else more. So… that’s good. Right?

You have to go to Hot Air for the rest of the story. Mostly because Ed’s last paragraph is hilarious.

Just to entice you to click- the Chinese Government official specifically uses the word Hate.

There is a little bit of salt and some water in the recipe, but the name is mostly a mystery. What is known is that the confection was first made popular in the vacation areas of New Jersey in the late 19th century, and spread from there.

Here’s the best story anyone could come up with on the name:

A guy was selling his taffy in a little shop by the sea shore. There was a huge storm that flooded his shop. As he was cleaning up, a customer came by and asked if he had any taffy for sale. The guy responded with something like “yeah, but now it’s salt water taffy.” And the name stuck.

That’s probably not true, at least not exactly. But it’s all we’ve got, so we just have to go with it. Some guy tried to trademark the name in the 1920′s, but lost.

For the record, this recipe calls for 1 teaspoon of salt and 3/4 cup water for a batch.

Source: History Channel (Modern Marvels) show on Candy

Ronald Reagan loved Jelly Beans. Jelly Bellys (Bellies?) to be exact. Legend has it that he picked up the jelly bean habit after quitting smoking in the 60′s.

Some Ronald Reagan/Jelly Belly fun facts for you, starting with the fun fact that inspired this post:

• In 1983, Reagan had NASA secretly put some Jelly Bellys on the Space Shuttle Challenger as a surprise for the Astronauts.
• RR kept a crystal jar full of Jelly Bellys on his desk in the Oval Office. He would also pass out the beans at cabinet meetings.
• During the Reagan inauguration, the revelers enjoyed almost 40 million jelly beans. That’s about 3 tons. The Blueberry flavor was invented for the occasion.
• A portrait of RR made of over 10,000 beans hangs in the Reagan Library in California. That’s what is pictured here, thanks to some guy on Flickr.

Source: Started with the History Channel (Modern Marvels) show on candy. Other sites linked above.

Update: It seems the Jelly Belly people use “Jelly Belly beans” as the official plural form.

…you find out he thought he saw a UFO once.

You can’t make this stuff up.

At least the part where you can dodge bullets all Neo-like – if a recent patent filing from IBM pans out:

The patent proposes a system where an external device monitors the area for incoming projectiles. If it detects a projectile headed near a person hooked into the system it can either shock their muscles in order to move their body a particular way to dodge the bullet, Neo style, or it could simply make the intended target collapse.

Unfortunately for everyone, this is IBM we’re talking about. The same company that makes Lotus Notes and Websphere. It’ll most likely run on Java and will freeze every third time you use it. Not something you want in a personal protection device.

Source: The firearm blog

And I ain’t talkin’ ’bout the brats running around at the McDonald’s playland.

I’m literally talking about kids. You know- baby goats.

Kid gloves, popular during the 19th and early 20th centuries, were made from the skin of baby goats or lambs. Because they came from the kiddies, they were softer than regular gloves.

So, to “treat someone/thing with kid gloves” means to treat them softly.

Source: The Straight Dope, inspired by a casual mention of kid gloves as actual gloves on a History Channel commercial.

The World Health Organization claims that 47% of the population of Austria smokes. Each smoker consumes an average of 2,073 cigarettes per year (or 5.6 cigarettes per day).

So you can predict that the new smoking ban there isn’t going all that well.

But Austria doesn’t have the highest percentage of smokers – that distinction belongs to a country called Nauru, which is, incidentally, the world’s smallest republic. 54% of the 12,000 residents smoke.

The runner-up is Nambia, where 50% of the 1.2 million residents have been known to choke down a heater now and then.

Check out stats for your favorite exotic locale here.